Consensual non-monogamy is a kind of relationship in which all partners involved give their consent to each other for not being monogamous and engage romantically and sexually with multiple partners. In Consensual non-monogamy, people can have one & only or more than one sexual partner. It is not considered cheating, as the partners are well aware and their consent is considered.
Those who engage in CNM have their set of rules and allow each other to have a romantic or sexual relationship with others. They tend to feel very strongly about community values. Phrases like- openness, inclusiveness, authenticity are often used to describe the feel about CNM. People engaged in CNM are generally seen to be more satisfied & happier than others. It's a personal choice whether a person wants to engage in multiple relationships or choose a single partner. Both have their own pros and cons.
One of the cons of being in a CNM relationship is that people tend to get jealous very often but jealousy is normal and this jealousy fades as time passes. CNM does not harm a person’s mental peace. Instead, partners in CNM are more faithful and honest towards each other because there is no place for judgments and any hidden conversation among them.
Monogamy (having only one sexual partner) is what is being practiced for years traditionally and we are being told to follow the culture. And that’s pretty awesome, this is completely a person’s choice whether he/ she wants to commit to one person lifelong or want to explore multiple relationships.
Now the question comes, what makes people get engaged in CNM kind of relationships?
Well, the only answer I can think of is, because they want it and the desire for it. This is more than enough to realize the fact that every person around has the right to behave and act according to their will and desires. Still, let's talk about some common reasons people engaged in CNM have in response to this query;
• They want to explore sexually, romantically, and sometimes emotionally as well.
• A partner may not be able to meet your sexual or emotional needs.
• They might love more than one person at a time. Some people are programmed away to love more than one person together and monogamy restricts them to come up with their truest selves.
• Some of them might believe that monogamy is the product of jealousy, barriers, and possessiveness. CNM helps them enjoy their sexuality without being afraid of negative outcomes.
People often feel negative about CNM and try avoiding the discussion by putting the judgments and offensive reactions. There is so much stigmatization around these kinds of relationships, even it’s quite not so common to talk about love and sex. Though it is just becoming better than before nowadays still the complexity, taboo, and stigma are there. But the need of the hour is to open up about everything we do, we talk, we feel and we desire.
In today's generation, people care more about their happiness rather than societal pressure and judgments, which is a good thing to see. If someone is willing to explore their options sexually and desire to get involved in CNM then there's nothing wrong with that as far as they do it for their own satisfaction and happiness without any external pressure.
According to my, CNM is ethically right because all the partners involved in CNM do it with their will and without any force. Everyone involved in such a relationship is aware of its consequences. We really are not supposed to put everything under the measurement of being right and wrong also good and bad. It is not our duty to validate everything around and increase the list of taboos growing every day. Till the time it concerns two or many people involved in CNM and it does not bother them or their relationship, it is perfectly okay.
CNM has unknowingly become very common and will eventually grow in the future. Enforcing or restricting people to monogamy against their will can be traumatic and affect both partners in the relationship psychologically. So many people around keep grinding their emotions and desires inside them, just because they don’t get comfortable surroundings to open up about their sexuality. Many therapists and relationship advisors are doing their job well in creating a safe and aware place. It is better to accept the truth and let people around be the way they want to. We all just need to be concerned about every aspect of others without being judgmental. Let’s make this world a better place to breathe together.
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